Your mind is a tool not a dictator.

When were children we accepted thoughts as coming un-bid into our minds. And it is true that memories are evoked by the actions you are taking right now.

So many try to justify their actions by blaming them on passed events.  We are lenient on criminals because of their upbringing. We hold back telling a friend bad news because they have had such a hard life. We are selfish with our friends because we didn't get enough love as children.

As adults we recognize that we are fully responsible for our thoughts and actions. If we insist that how we think is how other people should behave, then we are building unrealistic expectations. We are not the rule makers for everyone else.

Our actions are happening now. The only connection that an event happening now has to the past is your memory of it. That is just rationalization. You are connecting the dots where dots are not intended to be connected.

By recognizing that you are in control of your mind, by recognizing that you have a choice about how and what you think, about how and what you say to yourself, you begin to master your mind as a tool.

At first this is strange. You have always been taught that what you think is who you are. In fact, you are more that what you think and how you behave. You are a spirit, a life force and it is to that life force, that awareness of being aware that you give control.

So step back for a moment, and monitor your thoughts. Imagine yourself standing in the corner of you mind and seeing your thoughts and feelings as words and images.

You only need to do this a few times to realize that you can change what you do and say to yourself.

Some people love drama and so create drama for themselves. I once heard it said that some people will never admit that they are ordinary people. Instead they create drama in their lives by imagining themselves related to royalty, or by associating only with certain people they deem worthy.

No one is ordinary. Each and everyone of us is totally unique. There will never be another you, to quote a famous song.

What we choose to tell ourselves creates the expectations we have of the world around us. And, yes, we choose our own thoughts even when  they have become so habitual that we are convinced that there is no other way to think.

The thoughts  that are in your head and the words you choose to express them with, to yourself or the world around you, are your own. It is those thoughts that create the feelings and expectations you have about the world around you.

So take responsibility for your thoughts, for your imagined standards, for your expectations. And, remember words are just empty air unless you take action. You may tell yourself that you intend to do something, but the words are worthless unless you actually do that something.

Who is in charge of your mind?

Even in a country where the state controls every public action, you can take charge of you thoughts and how you express them to yourself and others.

In some languages there is no single word for mind. Instead the word for spirit is used.  Besides, there really is no mind, it is only a word we use to relate a bunch of things we do in our brain.

So master your thoughts. At least begin the journey.